My beloved wife gave birth to our son in what was a fast but somewhat traumatic labour. Despite the trauma, the speed of the delivery was a bonus. I am grateful that the event did not take hours.
Coming into the world with a good weight, and with all appendages he’s doing well. After settling in over the past week he’s lost part of his original birth-weight, put some back on, and is presently maintaining it.
The breastfeeding is challenging, but we are persevering and finding our way through it. Some nights are better than others, but we’re all getting some hours sleep in here and there. I did come to dread the night, realising that there was likely to be little peace and worrying about the health of my wife. However, this has begun to abate somewhat and is no longer causing me the worry it has.
Diet for all parties is good, which I am also grateful for. He’s had a couple of bath’s and doesn’t seem to mind so far, although he doesn’t like the cold too much.
As for myself it has taken some time to get over the overwhelming sense of anxiety. This is not due to being a father, but more so out of fear of something going wrong with him and/or my wife. I have learned just how poisonous a pessimistic mind can be in such a situation, and did not realise just how bad my mind had become over time. With a significant amount of conscious thought and meditation involving my “happy place” I have been able to accept the anxiety and let it flow through and pass me to some degree. I have no delusions that there will always be some element of anxiety and worry, but that to accept this rather than resist it will lead to dealing with it in a positive and effective manner.
I am eternally grateful to my wife for being the person she is and working together we are coping with our new arrival well. Thanks of course must also be paid to family and friends who are constantly nearby and in our thoughts.
We received tremendous service and support from the staff at the hospital. The experience made me realise just how grateful one can be for their vigilance and presence in such times. I have had my differences over the hospital in the past, but now look upon it in a different light, and in some way feel that those differences have been settled now. In being in close contact with the staff I felt the compassionate nature of those people in helping complete strangers and could see that they have truly earned great honour in their work. The experience has shown me that I can help in this spirit and since then I have become more charitable, donating money via eBay to charities upon the purchase of various items from the website. It has reminded me of part of a passage from Milton’s Paradise Lost where God decrees:
“Mercy, first and last, shall brightest shine.”
It has all been a very sobering and illuminating experience.
Since finishing the degree I have slowly returned to doing the things I used to enjoy, as 
). I remember going up ‘anley duck to the small arcade where Fantasy World (now Forbidden Planet) used to be, and next door was a games shop. On Saturday it was a regular haunt for gamers to go and play on the arcade games. R-Type, Robocop, Final Fight, Shadow Warriors…awesome. I also remember nearly being knifed down Hope Street inside Castle Computers by a group of youth’s after my wallet 
Not nice. There are plenty more memories, far too many to list here but for sure playing computer games made me happy.
